Praying for Love in a Lap Dance
by MsComrade
Summary: Zoro ventures into a strip club to relieve some tension, only to come face to face with the cause of all of his frustrations.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece. Trust me, I wish I did, but I don't. Title comes from the song "But It's Better If You Do" by Panic at the Disco

Pairing: ZoSan

He was fed up. Roronoa Zoro had finally reached his breaking point, and it was all that stupid blonde's fault. It'd been going on for weeks now. Sometime when they had been fighting, in a mess of swords and feet he realized how fucking gorgeous the shitty cook was, and it all went downhill from there. He couldn't fight with Sanji anymore, he got too distracted. He couldn't even be in the same room with the guy without his eyes raking over the cook's slim figure. Zoro was pent up and tired of cold showers. Which was why he was currently standing in front of a strip club. An all-male strip club.

The swordsman pulled the hood of his cloak further down his face. He'd never live it down if he got caught in a place like this. Taking a deep breath, Zoro swallowed his pride and pushed through the door. It was dark inside, except for the spotlights trained on the stage. The deep bass of the music pounded in his skull. He was starting to regret his decision. Most of the other patrons were either fat old men, or greasy looking loners. He watched as one of the scantily clad dancers ground into an obese man's lap. Zoro couldn't help but grimace. How could somebody subject themselves to that? He'd seen enough, this definitely wasn't a good idea. He was just about to turn around and walk back out when a hand, tipped with long red nails grasped his shoulder.  
"Hey there big boy," the woman behind him rasped, blowing out a lungful of smoke, "Welcome to my fun house." She let out a grating laugh. She was a large woman, red hair piled in a messy bun on her head, and years of smoking had etched deep wrinkles onto her leathery skin "So what can I help you with tonight hot stuff?"

Zoro stiffened, it was now or never. "Yea, any way I could, um…get a private dance?" The swordsman could feel his face heating up. What the hell was he doing?

The woman laughed and put a bulky arm around his shoulder, leading him down a dark hall, "Sure thing doll face," She smiled, exposing her crooked yellow teeth from beneath her painted vermilion lips, "it'll cost you though." Zoro mechanically reached into his pocket, pulling out his large stack of bellis. Once the swordsman had thought up this little plan a few weeks back he'd been saving up. He looked down at the money. He could probably pay off a big part of his debt to the witch with this. He could buy Chopper those new books he wanted. He could buy himself enough booze to last him weeks.

The woman gave a low chuckle when he slapped the money in her palm. "Any special requests darling?" she asked, smoke curling from her lips.

"Blonde."

What the hell? The words had left his mouth before his brain had even registered her question. He could feel his flush creeping from his cheeks all the way up his ears and down his neck. The woman let out a loud hoarse cackle, "You have good taste. We have a blonde on shift tonight that'll blow you away. Best dancer I've seen in a while. He's made me a pretty penny and he's only been here a few days. Great timing on your part too sweet cheeks, he's leaving tomorrow."

Zoro's heartbeat was drumming loudly in his ears when her thick arm pulled a door open for him. There was a slightly elevated platform with a pole at the middle bathed in light. A single plush arm chair was set up in front of the stage. The swordsman stepped inside on numb legs, the door closing swiftly behind him. He let out a long breath, no backing out now. He sunk down into the plush cushions just as a smooth jazz beat started to pick up on the speakers and a slim blonde sauntered across the stage.

He could swear, his heart stopped for a moment. His mouth felt dry as his wide eyes took in those long pale legs, pert ass barely covered by a pair of small, light blue shorts, up a thin, but toned chest, all the way to the absurdly curled eyebrow perched above an ocean blue eye.

Sanji.

The blonde shot him a seductive look before grabbing onto the pole and wrapping himself around it tantalizingly. What the hell was going on? Why was their _woman crazy_ cook in an _all-male_ strip joint, on stage, dancing? Lucky for Zoro, it looked like the cook didn't recognize him, and for once he was happy he left his swords back on the ship.

Sanji's movements were like liquid as he swung and arched his body. The swordsman always knew that the cook was flexible, but he'd never seen him move like this before. Zoro's pants were starting to get uncomfortably tight. He breathed heavily through his nose and did his best to keep his face hidden.

Shit. Sanji was looking right at him. The blonde carefully slid himself down the smooth metal back onto his feet. The cook's slim hips swayed slightly as he walked toward the swordsman, easily jumping off the small stage. Zoro pulled his hood down as Sanji climbed on top of him, straddling his lap. "Hey," his voice was low and sultry, "what's wrong? Don't I make you happy?" The blonde's bottom lip jutted out in a slight pout. Wrapping his arms around Zoro's neck, he pulled himself closer. The green haired man stiffened when their groins brushed against each other. He pressed his mouth into a hard line, waiting for the blonde to get the hint and get the hell off of him. But Sanji stayed put. He could feel the visible blue eye studying him closely.

The cook sighed, leaning back so his weight rested on Zoro's thighs, "Tell me about him." Zoro flinched. "And don't try and play dumb with me either," the blonde continued, "I have a knack about these sorts of things. So who is he?" The swordsman stayed silent, hoping Sanji would just drop it and let him leave. He didn't. The cook sighed loudly, pulling his fingers through his bangs, "its unhealthy to bottle it up you know…" he muttered.

"Why the fuck do you care. You're a fucking stripper not a therapist." shit, that came out harsher than he had intended. Sanji just chuckled, giving him a sad smile, "Because I'm going through that shit too..." Zoro raised his head a little at that. The swordsman knew that Sanji was 'in love' with every woman he met, but had he actually gotten serious about one of them?

"Do you really think I'd be here, in your lap, if I had a nice man to settle down with?" Sanji let out a quiet chuckle, his eyes darkened with sadness and a faint blush on his cheeks, "Unrequited love is a bitch. I know what it's like man…so you can talk to me…"

A nice _man_ to settle down with? Since when has their lovesick cook liked men?! Zoro tried to suppress the warm feeling bubbling in his chest. Sanji liked men. Maybe there could be a chance…

"Let's go get some drinks," the blonde suggested suddenly, a smirk played on his lips, "This isn't the kind of place you should come if you're having relationship issues. Trust me. I've been doing this long enough," Sanji chuckled, but Zoro couldn't ignore the pained look in his eye. "C'mon stranger, it sounds like we could both use it."

Every cell in his body wanted to accept Sanji's offer, but there was no way he could let the love-cook know it was him, "No. But thanks for the offer." He said gruffly, hoping that Sanji wouldn't recognize his voice.

The blonde just shrugged, trying to brush it off, but Sanji was terrible at hiding his emotions. The disappointment was clear on his face. He climbed quickly out of Zoro's lap with a dark blush tinting his cheeks. "Well if that's it then, I'll need you to get the hell out," he pulled a cigarette out from behind his ear and headed back toward the stage, "You can ask Madame Valentine for your money back if you want. I won't dance for you tonight. Sorry."

Zoro gaped at the retreating figure. Anger suddenly flared up inside him. This entire mess was Sanji's fault. It was the stupid blonde's fault for riling him up like this, and the swordsman wasn't going to let him just walk away. He was going to make the cook finish what he started. Zoro reached out grabbed Sanji's wrist harshly, pulling the startled blonde back in his lap.

"No." Zoro growled into the cook's ear. Sanji shivered and started to try to squirm out of the swordsman's iron grip. The green haired man ignored the angry protests and threats that poured out of Sanji's mouth as he moved his lips down the blonde's pale neck. Sanji grew rigid when Zoro's hands caressed his hips and moved to grip his ass. The swordsman pulled away from Sanji's neck. The cook's fists were clenched at his side but his face was emotionless.

"I'm not allowed to injure customers," He said, his voice monotone, "do what you want, and get out."

Zoro froze. What the hell was he doing? He pulled his hands away, keeping his eyes downcast. Molesting the cook wasn't going to make his situation any better, he winced as guilt flooded through his system. He sighed, reaching a hand up under his hood to massage his temples. He shook his head lightly.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled out, blush flaring in his cheeks, "I got angry and….I got carried away." He felt the blonde relax a little, but his muscles were still tense.

"S'okay," the blonde muttered, refusing to meet his eyes, "most guys don't stop. So thanks for that." Zoro's eyes widened. The blonde before him, blushing and insecure, was so different from the Sanji he knew.

Zoro let out a large breath. He just knew he was going to regret this later, "Y'know, I think you were right, a drink sounds pretty nice right now." The large smile that graced the blonde's lips had his heart skip a beat.

"I'll go get dressed, be back in a sec!" the blonde said excitedly scrambling out of his lap.

He was definitely going to regret it later.


	2. Chapter 2

Zoro took another swig of his drink, making sure to keep his face hidden. The bar Sanji had taken them to was small, but not very crowded. The two had settled down at a table in the back corner, away from prying eyes. Zoro had already guzzled his first drink, and was eagerly looking for a second while his blonde companion tentatively sipped his beverage. The cook wasn't wearing his usual stuffy attire, although, Zoro wished he was. The loose fitting tank top, and sweatpants that hugged all the right places made Zoro's pulse quicken. To say the situation was awkward was a massive understatement. Sanji was waiting for Zoro to speak, the swordsman could feel the blonde's expectant gaze drilling into his face. He gritted his teeth, why on earth had he agreed to this? Zoro kept his head down, thankful for the shitty lighting. Maybe he'd be able to get away with this after all, and then he could just go back to the ship and try to forget this ever happened.

"My name is Sanji, by the way," Zoro jumped a little, the blonde's smooth baritone bringing him back to reality, "in case you wanted to know." The swordsman nodded curtly, keeping his eyes focused on the bottle clenched in his fist. "I'm a pirate," the cook continued, with a small smile, "and I'm a damn good cook."

"And a stripper," Zoro grumbled. He saw Sanji flinch out of the corner of his eyes, and the blonde's shoulders slumped a little. The swordsman ignored the small pangs of guilt in his chest. He needed to focus on getting away.

"Yea…" Sanji chuckled sadly, "…So stranger, are you gonna talk?" Zoro stayed silent, glaring at his almost empty bottle. The blonde sighed, taking another small sip of his drink, "the whole reason we came here was so we could talk ab-"

"Then keep talking" Zoro growled, careful to keep his voice low. He wanted to get out, but something else swirled in his gut. Sanji's 'unrequited' love had the swordsman's mind buzzing with curiosity. He ignored tightening in his stomach when he thought about the love-cook with some other guy. Green eyebrows pulled together in frustration, wishing the shitty waiter would come over and bring him more booze.

The blonde was quiet for a bit, blue eye trained on the crimson liquid in his glass. This was Zoro's chance. Just as he was about to push himself out of his chair the blonde finally spoke.

"I'm in love with one of my crewmates."

Zoro froze, his head whipping around so fast his hood almost fell off. The swordsman stared wide eyed at Sanji. The blonde's voice had been so small, so defeated. Nothing like the stupid love-cook he was used to. It was someone on the ship? Zoro's mind was racing. He said it was a man, so both Nami and Robin were out. He felt safe eliminating Chopper for obvious reasons, so that only left Ussop and Luffy. He seriously doubted the cook felt anything for their crazy captain. So was it Ussop maybe? He hadn't seen the cook and the sharpshooter hang out much, but whenever they did they always seemed to get along. Zoro's brow furrowed. He just couldn't picture the two together, but that might just have been the jealousy burning in the pit of his stomach.

"And….he hates me," the blonde whispered, keeping his eyes down.

His mouth went dry, and his palms began to sweat. He struggled to swallow the last of his drink. He looked around the room desperately. He REALLY needed another drink now. There was no fucking way….

"I'm pretty sure he knows too," the blonde mumbled, "he's been avoiding me and ignoring me for weeks now…I guess I was being kind of obvious…"

Zoro's heartbeat thudded loudly in his ears. He could feel the sweat beginning to bead on his brow. His stomach churned. Even if he got away now, even if Sanji didn't find out it was him, things wouldn't be able to go back to normal. He'd never be able to look at the cook the same way. He wouldn't be able to go back to normal as he had hoped. He felt sick to his stomach. Zoro stood up abruptly, not even noticing his overturned chair. He needed to get out.

"Hey! Wait a sec!"

Everything moved in slow motion when he felt Sanji's slim fingers grasp at his cloak. He felt the fabric slip off his head, revealing a mess of green hair. The cook stared at him, wide eyed, dozens of emotions flitting across his face. Before Zoro could speak the blonde had bolted, pushing his way through the other patrons and out of the door.

"Shit!" he rumbled, bolting out after the blonde. If he lost Sanji now he'd never be able to find him again in the maze of streets. Lucky for Zoro the blonde hadn't run very far. He found the blonde in an alley, leaning heavily against the wall, his shoulders slumped forward.

"Sanji I-"

"Did you have your fun asshole?" the monotone of Sanji's voice made him stiffen, "have a good laugh eh?" the blonde's shoulder's started to shake. Was the cook crying? Zoro's hands were awkwardly lingering in the air between them, torn. He didn't know what to do. This wasn't his usual stupidly confidant cook. The swordsman had invaded a very private part of his life. The Sanji before him, with tears streaking his cheeks and shame swirling in his eyes, was vulnerable. It unnerved Zoro.

"Sanji listen to me-"

"Why should I?!" Sanji's head snapped up to glare at the swordsman, angry tears pouring down his face, "give me one good reason why I should listen to a word you say after you went to such great lengths to humiliate me?!"

"Cook-"

"No! Just shut up you shitty swordsman!"

Zoro grit his teeth, this was really starting to piss him off. If that stupid cook could just keep quiet for minute. He watched Sanji's lips move, it was amazing sometimes how fast he could talk. It was a shame that everything he was saying right now was complete bullshit. The blonde had no intention of hearing him out.

"I won't bother you anymore, I get it, I understand. So let's just forget this ever happened and everything can go back to normal okay?" The cook was trying to act nonchalant, but he could see the sadness swirling in his eyes.

No.

Zoro clenched his fists. He didn't want things to go back. He didn't want to have to ignore Sanji anymore. Not when he knew the blonde felt the same way. This was his only chance, but the damn cook just wouldn't shut up. Zoro grabbed Sanji's face, heart thudding away in his chest, and pressed his lips harshly against the blonde's. Sanji's whole body was tense. Suddenly a fist collided with the swordsman's cheek, sending him staggering back a few steps. He ran his fingers over his throbbing cheek, Sanji had punched him. The shitty cook never used his hands to fight. The blonde was staring at him wide eyed, his pale face tinted a light crimson. His mouth was hanging open but for once nothing was coming out. Well, at least he finally shut him up.


	3. Chapter 3

"Sanji, listen to me. This was not some sick joke," Zoro blushed, "I had no idea that you were…working…there," Sanji's eyes narrowed at him. He hated when the blonde got that look. It usually meant that he was going to get his ass kicked. Zoro could see his window of opportunity closing fast, "I only went there 'cause I was feeling so pent up! I was just horny and needed it fixed!" Zoro winced at the glare the cook was giving him. Maybe he should have phrased that better.

"So what," Sanji snapped, his look growing darker with each passing second, "you were just going to use me like some fucking toy and then act like it never happened?!"

"Well…" Shit. It's like the blonde could read minds or something. At this point Zoro could feel the rage emanating from the cook.

"You just played along with it!" Sanji roared, tears rolling silently down his face "You knew I had feelings for you and you still played along with it! Back at the club… you let me dance on you like that…" Zoro could see red creeping down Sanji's neck, "A-and you fucking touched me! You touched me like all those other guys do! We're crewmates Zoro!" the cook practically shrieked at him. "Do you think I'm proud of doing that?! Do you think I like having strange men touch me and take advantage of me?!"

"Look, Sanji, I-"

"Shut up! Just shut up Zoro!" The swordsman had never seen Sanji like this. He was always the perfect picture of composure. It didn't matter what kind of fights they got into, as long as there wasn't a woman around he could always rely on the cook's level head. The blonde dropped his head in his hands, "and just now… that kiss… You're just playing with me, aren't you shit swordsman?" The words were soft and muffled, but they made Zoro's blood boil. Damn stubborn cook.

"Don't you dare try to put words in my mouth curly brow," Zoro growled, taking a step closer to the blonde, "you don't know what I've been going through these past weeks." The swordsman was rapidly closing the distance between him and Sanji, the cook's back pressed against the wall. "You have no idea what the fuck I'm feeling either," Zoro braced his hands on either side of Sanji's head, leaning in closer so they were nearly nose to nose. "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that."

The harsh knee in the stomach made the swordsman stagger back a little. He cursed under his breath. Of all of the people he could have fallen for, he fell for the over emotional the cook. He searched the blonde's features again. Sanji's glare had fallen, leaving him looking more lost than anything. His wide blue eye was locked on Zoro, watching him like he were some predator.

"You're lying," he whispered. The swordsman never imagined that so much pain could be held in two little words. "You're lying, I know you are. You hate me." The words cut Zoro deeper than any blade ever could. He shook his head vigorously, earrings chiming as they swung against each other. The look on Sanji's face made the swordsman's chest tighten painfully. Without thinking He grabbed the blonde's shoulders and pulled him into an embrace. His large arms easily encircled Sanji's slim waist. He pulled the lithe figure close to his chest, he could feel him trembling. The swordsman was able to relax a little after a few seconds without a kick.

"Why?" The blonde's whisper was muffled against the swordsman's chest.

Zoro chuckled lightly, pulling Sanji in closer, "because I think I love you, shit cook." Zoro felt him stiffen, but the swordsman let out a relieved sigh when he felt the blonde's long arms wrap around his waist.

"I didn't know moss was capable of having such complex emotions." Zoro grinned, that sounded more like the Sanji he knew.

"C'mon cook, I think I owe you a drink, and a talk." Sanji pulled back, raising a curled brow at the swordsman, "I promise, I'll actually talk this time…" He slung an arm around the blonde's shoulders leading him back to the bar.

* * *

"Tell me shit cook," Zoro growled. They'd been there for over an hour now. Things in the tiny pub were starting to wind down, both men doing their fair share of talking. Zoro's face was still glowing red from having to confess to the smug looking blonde.

"No."

Sanji refused to meet his eye. The swordsman let out en exasperated sigh. They needed to get everything out in the open. Everything. The swordsman didn't understand why the cook avoided the question so vehemently.

"C'mon curly brow, you said you'd talk."

Zoro didn't like the way Sanji's jaw clenched, or uncomfortable way his shoulders were tensed. It reminded him of the way the cook looked before battle. Hesitantly the swordsman laid a strong reassuring hand on the blonde's back. Zoro could practically feel the heat coming from the flush covering Sanji's face.

The smaller man let out a long exhale, he felt muscles relax under his fingers. "I started doing stuff like this when I was younger at the Baratie…" he murmured, tips of his ears growing red, "the geezer didn't pay me. It was easy money. And I was good at it, I got all kinds of attention, and I'm not gonna lie, I loved it. I liked the way they looked at me. Like I was valuable…But I attracted the wrong kind of attention…" A shudder rippled through his thin frame, "I don't even know how I survived that. I couldn't walk for nearly a week…" Sanji's voice had faded to a low murmur. Zoro kept his face neutral and moved his arm to wrap around the cook's shoulders, pulling him closer to himself. Sanji flinched at his touch, but soon relaxed into the hold, leaning against the swordsman. Zoro was thankful for the secluded corner in which their tiny table sat, if anybody tried to bother them right now, there was no promise that the swordsman wouldn't kill them. Emotions he usually worked to keep suppressed were bubbling up. He fought to keep himself composed, to keep his limbs from shaking with anger, and his face from twisting into a scowl. He took a deep breath, his grip on the thin shoulder tightening slightly. It would only make things worse if he were to get mad, who know what that would do to the cook. And there were no promises anything in the bar would come out in one piece.

"I stopped after that" the blonde continued, "Zeff started giving me a paycheck when I was able to get working again…I swore that I'd never do it again but…." Sanji tensed under Zoro's hold, his long fingers holding his glass in a death grip, "a couple months ago… Nami came to me… she said we were nearly broke… we go through food and supplies way too fast… She wanted to cut down everyone's allowance. She wanted to cut out yours completely." Zoro was surprised by the disdain in the blonde's voice. He never thought he'd hear Sanji use that tone when talking about his dear Nami. "She started talking about selling our things…she wanted…" the cook was trembling now, his curled brows pulled down into an angry scowl, "she wanted to sell one of your swords," he said through clenched teeth. Zoro couldn't stop his jaw from dropping. He knew that woman was pure evil, but he never thought she'd try to do something so rash as to sell his most precious belongings. "Selling your swords…would be the same thing as selling my hands…I couldn't let her do that. I wouldn't." For the first time since Sanji started talking he raised his eyes to look at Zoro, blue shone bright in defiance and pride "and not once have I regretted my decision."

The swordsman could only stare at the cook wide eyed as he pulled away from his hold and stood up, placing a few bellis under his empty glass. He wished he was better with words, and that he could think of something to say instead of just following Sanji out of the small bar without a word. He mentally cursed at himself. This was no time to be freezing up like this! Side by side they made their way back to the Merry in silence. Zoro's mind was racing, he needed to say something, anything. He jumped when he felt the cook's fingers interlock with his own. The swordsman head snapped to look at the blonde. Sanji kept his eye trained on the path in front of them, but couldn't hide the small smile pulling at his lips. Zoro squeezed the cook's hand gently, his own smile growing on his lips. Maybe some things just didn't need words.


End file.
